MOTION TO CONVERT CHRISTIAN COMMUNITY CONTROL (HOUSE ARREST) TO JEWISH PROBATION

Motion to convert community control (house arrest) to probation. It sounds almost religious in nature. Like we’ll convert from Christian Community Control to Jewish Probation. For Jewish probation you meet once a month with a stereotypical Jewish Mother who makes you feel guilty for what you did. “How could you embarrass your family like this. What were you thinking. Your mother didn’t bring you up this way. I can’t believe you did this. I’m so ashamed. How could this happen. Oy Vey. Oy Vey. Oy vey.”  The worst is Jewish House Arrest because then a Jewish mother moves in with you. “Get up. Get to work. Eat your breakfast. Dress warmly. Stay out of trouble. Be good. Make me proud. Be on time for dinner.” -1

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